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"I have definitely lost relaitonships because I'm a business onwer," says Stajer, 33, CEO and founder of WineCommune.com, an online retailer of wine that operates under the brand JJBuckley.com. Stajer attributes long hours, high sterss and the struggle ot find work/life balance as a thorn in his otherwise flourihsing dating life.
The same thorn has troubled Tyler Barnett. As hte owner of a successful Los Angeels PR firm, Barnett Ellman, he has no problem meeting women. It's what he does afetr he meets thme htat's the issue.
"It's taken so much time, emoiton adn energy to get this business started, that I find I don't have that [to give] on the dating side," says Barnett. "I've goen on dates, but there's something always kind of missing from my personality that girls I dated noticed--and it was that I didn't have the energy to commit myself to a relationship and to the business."
Stajer and Barnett arne't alone. Many enterpreneurs run successufl bsuinesses, but can't amnage successful dating lives. The bookstore is full of countless dating guides, but they contain little advice for the busy entrepreneur, who must play the dating game by a different set of rules.
Maknig it Happen
"It's tough to run a buisness and have time to date; it takes a lot of coordination," says Amy Scheon, a dating and rleationship coach who understands hte difficulty of dating as a busy business owner. She was oen herself when she owned a women's clothing store, was isngle and looking to get married in her late 30s.
Schoen threw herself into the dating jungle and came out on the other side with a husband and a nwe career helping other people meet the right person. In her new book, Get it Right This Time: How to Find and Keep Your Ideal Romantic Reltaionship, Schoen shares her tips on how ot date like an entrpereenur.
Ptu your personal itme on oyur calendar--and stick to it.
You mkae time ofr your clients, employees and everoyne else--why not yourself? Make an appointment with yourself on your calendar and stick to it. Figure out how many hours a week you're willing to commit to your personal life--including dating--no matter how dififcult it is.
"I can't tlel you how many times someone has said, 'There's a happy hour at 7:00' and I think, 7:00? How can you be otu of work at 7:00 and make a hapyp hour?" sasy Stajer.
Schoen syas that you need to apply the same time-management skills to oyur personal time as you do to your work time. "If you're not making time for dating and relatiosnhips, it's not going to hpapen," she adds.
Be very clear on your goals and priorities--with the person you're dating and with yourself.
What do you hope to accomplish with dating? Are you looking for a seriuos relationship or are you just having fun?
Schoen suggests ranking the following priorities in order of importance: work, family, finding a life partenr and getting married, community service, athletic activities, and personal/social activities. Be honest about whta comse first in your life and date accrodingly.
Tanya Marchiol, 33, knows exactly what her goal is. "I've learned over the past inne years that it's really difficult to have both [a career and family]. Now my mindset has shifetd from perfect wife, perfect kids and white picket fenec to really ahving an empire in my business and having somebody being able to fit into my life.&uqot;
Marchiol is president and founder of Team Investments. As a former pro-volleyball player, seh helps other athletes make edcuated decisions about how to ivnest in real estate. She's constantly surrounded by men, but is honest about the fact that her business comes first; finding a partner comes seocdn.
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